I've got the shakes!!!

It's been 24 hours since deactivating my facebook account. That's 24 hours of not knowing what the latest gossip is on people I haven't spoken to in over 5 years. It's 24 hours of not having a platform to burn bridges with. 24 hours of constant reminder that real friendships, both physically and metaphysically have to be engaged in by both parties. It's pretty sad that we consider it acceptable to let a digital poster represent ourselves and our relationship to others. it was nice at first to have a way to "reconnect" with people we used to know, but beyond those first few moments, of "hey, we used to know each other." it becomes unbearably superficial.

At least that was my experience for the most part.

Today's weather, cold with a side a wind driven cold. The kind of cold where your engine has a difficult time turning over. Cold to where you can't remember if the sun was out or not, because it didn't make a difference either way. The cold that reminds me just how warm the sands of Venice Beach were under California skies. The warm rush of air whipping through a ford mustang as it whipped around the turns of sunset blvd.

I'm dropping my third calculus class this week. I really enjoy mathematics, really, but I can't juggle it and 3 other courses that are required for my major this quarter. Combine that with a lecturer that has a terrible chinese accent smothering an inability to teach, it can get pretty miserable pretty quick. With Calculus out of the way, I can focus on O chem, latin and global environmental history, and hopefully come out with a 3.5 at the end of the quarter.

I found out that the astrophysics department meets every morning to discuss current research and debate the conclusions. I went this morning. For the first time I felt like I was sitting in a room where it was really oh k to be excited by all the little beautiful things about science and our universe. to be excited without someone calling "nerd" "geek" "dork" "nerd-alert".

sometimes I wish I was studying astrophysics, but I don't know what I'd do with it or where I'd go. It seems such a shame that we'll learn so much about the universe, but never be allowed by the public to devote the resources to exploring it.