Hollywood

Living in Hollywood for 3 weeks without a job or school has afforded me great opportunity for observation. From what I can tell there are basically 3 groups of people that exist here.

1.) Tourists 2.) aging hipsters 3.) bums

The rest of the people living here are generally holed up in their homes or jobs or school. Really, I don't know why anyone but the aging hipsters come here. I guess its the celebrity complex. I've already decided that once I am financially stable and productive I will be moving to any one of the surrounding neighborhoods. Its not a good place to live. Hollywood is a world unto itself, a world with no direction and understanding.

It's sunny here most of the time, and its warm. So beautiful with the palm trees and renovated buildings. Taking the good with the bad and being thankful for both is an aquired talent. Some days I find it hard to be excited to for the present. Only placing my hope in some fantastical future that may or may not be waiting to exist. Forgetting the present is a gift.

Funny how the evangelical Christians I grew up with constantly berated all the things that ushered forth from the burgeoning etertainment genious that exists here. How they taught us to hide from it. Never to understand and to own it. They complain and fear of the evil influences, and do so because it is their own fault. There is no God out here for anyone to see. It is a shame. I never knew such disdain for Christianity existed in this country, but it is prevalent out here. And the disgust runs deep. A combination of naivety, arrogance, misunderstanding and miscommunication have turned so many away from any form of Christianity. So many search for and believe in an almighty god, but with no direction, with no understanding. I find myself in the same boat anymore. Wondering constantly what is truth and what is biased bullshit. there has come a time in my life where my connection with God has disappeared or shriveled away. It happened over a period of weeks. You wake up wondering what happened? Did I do something wrong? That was well over a year and a half ago. Time passes and you become used to it. No, my faith never disappeared. Perhaps my innocence, my devotion and zealousness are swimming in some lost ocean. So many friends I had at school are fortunate to live in an environment where the test of their morals and true beliefs are never put over a hot fire. It's easier to live that way, perhaps not as good or honest, but sometimes ignorance is bliss.


Tomorrow, classes at MI start. It has been almost a year since I dropped out of Cedarville in anticipation of this attending this school. I am thankful to be here, to have the opportunities I have had. To meet people from every corner of the states, and Europe and the Orient. It is weird to think that most of the kids i grew up with are still in West Virginia, always wishing they were somewhere else, but too afraid to the moves to make it happen. It takes some balls to leave all your friends behind, a car, parents and siblings, a house with my own "East Wing" and move 2300 miles away to a world I had no Idea really existed. You become so accustomed to odd things, that if someone were to walk down the street with a severed head in their hand, I would probably just keep walking like I hardly noticed....

goodnight